Now! Now! Now!

I am the kind of girl that wants what I want NOW! I don't like to wait, I don't like to have to keep thinking about it, I just want it NOW! So, when I came across this just now, I felt a severe attack of being pissed off at myself coming on. My damn master bathroom shit is ON SALE! Do you see the price difference? Do you see how much money I could have spent on other stuff? Why, why, WHY am I like this? Oh well, can't change it... I'm over it now. Leaving to go shopping again... for the rest of my accessories/decor for our main bath.

Homecoming Update

Remember when I posted this about H and the homecoming dance and game? Well, it turns out that H is too young to attend the dance. It's for junior high. When he told me this, he also told me that he was not going to take anyone to the game either. Then last night he informs me that he is taking C, but C does not know if she is going to be able to go or not. He wants me to go ahead and make her a mum to wear anyway. In addition to that, he wants me to make a garter for him to wear on his arm. It's not that I mind doing this for him, but (1) C doesn't even know if she will be allowed to go yet, (2) I am working until 5PM today, (3) H has soccer practice at 5:30, (4) S has soccer pictures at 5:30, AND (6) I have to go to my mom's to set up for the garage sale that she is having on Friday and Saturday. I won't even be able to go get the stuff for a mum and garter until after work, it will take a few hours to take all of our stuff to my mom's and get set up, and then it will take a few more hours to make the homecoming things. I won't be surprised if I don't get any sleep tonight at all!!!! Wish me luck!

I Need to VENT!!!!!!!

***THIS POST HAS SELF-DESTRUCTED***

Happy 8th birthday little girl!!!

Love you always,

Mommy and Daddy

Pure Craziness... Plain & Simple

Work has me so overloaded that I have had time to post because I've had to have time to read what's going on with all of you. Another week and it will begin to settle down!

Our baby girl turns 8 years old on Sunday. Unbelievable!!! We are having her party on Saturday. It is a spa/slumber party. Hard work, but definitely exciting. I am venturing out and making the cake myself. I'll take pictures of the party and post them next week (hopefully). M and I are having lunch with her at school today and then I'm taking cupcakes and juice up to her class this afternoon.

H is doing very good. He is involved in everything that he can possibly be involved in at school. I am so proud of him. I was watching him at soccer practice last night and I didn't realize how quickly he is improving. He's finally got his confidence up (maybe a little too high) so he is balls to the wall with everything.

D is settling down again. Finally sleeping through the night again (thanks to taking him off of milk which we think he is allergic too). Our nightly routine is falling into place again so that makes things so much easier. I just wish that M and I could get to bed before midnight everynight. It's just really hard because all the kids are not laid down and tucked in until 9PM, so after that we have to shower and have our time together. We haven't even had a chance to watch a movie together in I don't know how long. I really wish that we could have more time together. Oh well, maybe one day.

What I Wish...

You want to know what I wish for?

I wish that my mother-in-law and father-in-law lived closer to us. We all miss them so much! I really hope that they are able to come for Christmas this year and watch the kids have Santa. They would LOVE it!

S saw a car drive by our house a few days ago and it looked just like Grandmaw's car. She started chasing it and yelling for Grandmaw. Then she came back to me and asked why Grandmaw would just drive by and not stop. I told her that she would NEVER NEVER do that and that we would call her just so S knew she was at home (1000 miles away). But I couldn't because she was out of town (on a cruise). I don't have the heart to tell her about S. All you saw was blonde hair flying yelling for Grandmaw to stop. I'm tearing up just typing this!!

Anyway, I wish they were here. At least maybe they can come for Christmas!!! Pray for that!

Homecoming

H has asked a girl to the homecoming game and the homecoming dance!!!! He is not interested in her as a girlfriend. She is one of our neighbors. He had asked this one little girl, but her mom said that she needed to get to know other people too. WTF? Are you kidding me? M asked him if he asked her to get married and have kids. H said no. Then I told him that he needed to tell her that he was only asking to going to a friggin 5th grade dance! Hold Sh*t! What was that all about? So... Mommy and I will be making a mum and a garter in the next few weeks. I am so excited. It's hard to believe that it's already time for one of our babies to be doing this!!! I'm taking him to the mall to pick out a new outfit and to get his hair cut. I'm thinking he's going to ask me about his own colgne too!! I'll be taking tons of pics so be prepared. We'll be taking them out to dinner too... with their own table!!!! S is going to the game too (with us), but she's not old enough for the dance. It's only for 5th grade. She does, however, want to ask a certain little boy to be her date at the game. BOO HOO!!!

Invisible

I'm invisible... but it is worth more than anyone other than a Mommy will ever understand!!

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the phone?' Obviously not. No one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all. I'm invisible.

Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more: Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this? Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, 'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.'

I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated, but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going, she's going, she's gone!

One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating thereturn of a friend from England. Janice had just gotten back from a fabuloustrip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not tocompare and feel sorry for myself as I looked down at my out-of- style dress; it was the only thing I could find that was clean. My unwashed hair was pulled up in a banana clip and I was afraid I could actually smell peanut butter in it. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I brought you this.' It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe. I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription: 'To Charlotte, with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.'

In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work: No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names. These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished. They made great sacrifices and expected no credit. The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.

A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof? No one will ever see it. And the workman replied, 'Because God sees.'

I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you, Charlotte. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does. No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become.'

At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction. But it is not a disease that is erasing my life. It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride. I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree.

When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the table.' That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add, 'You're gonna love it there.'

As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.

Great Job, Mom!

I feel as if there are not enough hours in the day. I am so behind in my blogging... I'm sorry!

The fall in the hardest time for us. The kids start back to school, soccer, dance, girl scouts, church. It take a little while for us to get into the routine again; however, I will have to say that things are running very smoothly this far. It could not happen without my Mommy and M helping out. Especially Mommy, she does so much. I want to give her a special thank you... any suggestions?

I've started working overtime so that may or may not allot me a little extra time for blogging. I sure do hope so. I'm also way behind on downloading my pictures and printing them/sending them out.

I'll leave you with what few I have right now...

Little H

Never Before Seen...

Here are a few pictures of little miss S...